Saturday, March 27, 2010

Palms and PocketsChapter 24: Post Board

Palms and Pockets

by Paul Diaz

Chapter 24: Post Board

The semester was about to end and Anne was very sad because John never returned to his usual self. They would still go together to school every morning but gone was their cheerful talks and she did really miss his sweetness.

Every morning Anne would have a small post it and pass by the small board at the center of campus to stick it there. She was hoping that John would come with her so he could read the messages she made for him.

One day Saturday John decided to go to school and study at the library. He usually would ask Anne for help but he was firm with his decision of just being a friend to her. He passed by the small post it board and saw a schoolmate posting something.

“So you are the one that makes those poems?” John asked and the man nodded. “Do you like them?” the man asked. “Not me, my friend does” he replied. “My name is Aron, and this are my poems for my girlfriend” the man said.

“My name is John” he said and the two shook hands. “You say your friend reads my works?” Aron asked and John nodded. “Well she wants to tell you that she is sorry” the poet replied and the young man was surprised.

“Who she?” John asked and the poet laughed. “Oh sorry, I thought these little posts were for you” Aron said as he pointed at the dozens of little notes saying “John, I am sorry”

John froze as he recognized Anne’s handwriting. Those notes were indeed for him. “That is her handwriting” he uttered. “Then she wants to say sorry. You should forgive her man. Here I have a little note pad and you can post your reply” Aron offered.

“What we have is complicated” John said and the poet looked at him. “You don’t know the power of this post board then. Some may think of it as crap but to some its something special. This is where I met my girlfriend. I love making poems and when I was a freshman I did post some of my works here”

“I was happy to know that there were some students who loved my work. So every early morning when there are no people around I would add a new post. The funny thing is my old posts are all gone. Then one day as I was about to post she came to me showing all my posts with her. From that day on we are still together and the poems I make are now for her” Aron revealed.

“Good for you” John said and the poet laughed. “There are lots who benefitted from this post board. Couples that fight and don’t want to talk to each other. They post little messages with the hope that their partners do read them. Some do and some don’t. the ones who do are back together again and I cant say where those couples who didn’t read are. You are here and you have read her message, messages that is. Why don’t you try and respond to her and maybe you can work things out” Aron suggested.

“I really don’t want to talk to her. I told you our situation is complicated” John insisted. “Well if you don’t want to talk to her then use this board to do the talking” Aron said. John looked at the board and nodded, Anne would always pass by here every morning to read. “I just cant reply with a simple note, she loves poems” John said.

“So make her one” the poet replied and the young man laughed. “I am not like you who is talented in that area” John told him. “Oh no you are wrong. Everyone can write poems. Its very easy” Aron said. “How easy?” John asked.

“You have lots of things you want to tell her I can see that. So tell her through the poem. Its just like speaking to her directly. So whatever you are feeling just let it out through a poem” Aron explained. “But I don’t know how to write a poem” the young man said.

“The easiest and most common is the poems that have endings that rhymes. Stick with that for beginners, the dictionary can help you when you are lost for words” Aron said. “Yeah I could do that, but what am I supposed to say?” John asked. “Tell her what you feel. Tell her what you really want to tell her. It does not have to be a perfect poem to be loved by many, once she reads it she will know it is for her. Keep it simple but make sure the message is clear. So I have to go now dude, don’t forget to put your name so I can also read it” Aron told him and then left.

For several hours in the library John tried making a poem. Several crumpled pieces of paper later he gave up and decided to go home. The whole Sunday he did try again but he could not find the right words to say to her. He finally gave up and got his books and decided to study instead.

Monday morning John and Anne had a break. The young man decided to sit down alone on a nearby bench while the young woman joined her female friends. While observing people around, John looked at Anne and suddenly he took out his notebook and began to write.

“He still is not talking to you like you want him to?” Sue asked and Anne shook her head. “Well he keeps looking at you, maybe he is sketching you” her friend added. “He doesn’t know how to draw” Anne told her. “Well whatever he is doing he keeps looking at you like the way you look at him” Sue told her and Anne smiled.

“You know what when we saw you two at the start of the semester we really thought that you two were a couple” Sue said and Anne sighed. “You two were really sweet and remember the first day we met? You couldn’t stop talking about him for weeks” her friend added and the more sad Anne became.

“Now you two just look like you are normal friends” Sue said and Anne was surprised and looked at her. “What did you say?” she asked. “Normal friends, you know I know you and you know me. Or if you need help I am there if not then I mind my own business. That kind of friend thing” her friend explained.

Sue hit the target for that is what was really happening. Anne shook her head in disbelief, “I don’t want it to be this way” she said. “Then why did you break up with him?” Sue asked. “We were not a couple, we are just friends” Anne explained. “Yeah right, well if you want the old feelings back then get back with him” Sue said. “I told you we were not a couple” Anne reiterated. “Then be content with him being a friend then, if you want more then you know what to do” her friend said.

The following morning as John and Anne were entering campus, the young man walked towards the post board. “Where are you going?” she asked. “To the post board, aren’t you coming?” he told her. “I can see from here that there is nothing new” she told him. “Okay then meet you in class later” John said as he took out a light blue sheet of paper from his notebook.

Anne saw the piece of paper but didn’t bother as she walked to their building. After their exam they had a long break. John decided to go for a walk and Anne went to her friend. Before she could reach her friends the young woman turned her head to look at him and saw several students pointing at him. She stood still and watched several more students approach John and pat his shoulders.

Anne was surprised as more students, mostly girls walked beside John and they were all comforting him. “What the hell is wrong?” Anne asked and her friend Sue stood beside her. “Now I know what is happening between the two of you and I must say I really feel sorry for him” she said.

Anne looked at her friend and didn’t understand what she was saying. “What are you talking about?” she asked. “He posted a poem on the board this morning, you didn’t know?” Sue told her. “Oh my, was in on a light blue piece of paper?” Anne asked and her friend nodded.

The young woman ran towards the board. There were lots of students gathered there reading John’s poem. Anne squeezed her way in front and immediately saw what her friend had written.

To Anne:

Palms and Pockets

It took me some time to admit it to you
These feelings inside me that are so true
Such strong emotions gathered inside of me
In love with you i am completely

What made the occasion remarkable and oh so sweeter
Was when i told you and hearing your response after
I never expected those words from you
Those four words you said, i love you too.

A mere mention of you name makes my heart pump faster
I wish time stops so i can be with you forever
Sleeping at night and dreaming of your smile
Makes waking up the next day and living worthwhile

But then one day that smile became crooked
I felt quite alone and then unwanted
You would still flash your smile when you look at me
With your back turned still smiling, but who is he?

The lie shall set me free i tell you
the truth shall make me stay beside you
With that lie i have no choice but leave and let go
With the truth i can forgive and be forever with you

Am i in your palm that you hold close to your heart?
Or do you put me in your pocket when we are apart?
In you palms that is where i would like to be
Not in your pocket, only brought out when you need me

Whatever choice you make my love for you shall remain
Just pick one answer, there is no need to explain
Dont worry about my feelings, i will learn to forget
So tell me my love, am i in your palm or in your pocket?

From John

Tears poured down her cheeks, she didn’t feel embarrassed for lots of girls were crying too. Aron stood beside Anne and offered a hanky. “So tell me palm or pocket?” he asked and the young woman looked at her. “Excuse me?” she asked.

“Palm or pocket?” he repeated. “Do I know you?” Anne asked. “You don’t but I know him and you are the one that seem very much affected so I would guess you are Anne” Aron said. Anne kept silent as she could not stop her tears from falling, she tried to ignore him but he just stood there and posted a poem of his own.

“Wait you are the one that wrote those nice poems?” she asked and Aron smiled and nodded at her. “This is a bad day for me though, I really didn’t want to post my poem today when I heard someone posted a really touching poem but I had to because this is for my girlfriend” he told her.

Anne smiled and finally accepted the hanky and wiped her tears. “He came here last Saturday, we had a talk. I told him to make a poem because he wanted to reply to your posts. He said you liked poems so he will make one. I didn’t imagine that he would make one like this”

“The poems I make are for my girlfriend. Some people think they are great but they can never comprehend the real feelings hidden within the poems. John made one that everyone understands, look a lot are crying” Aron said as Anne looked around and saw a lot indeed sobbing.

“Still they don’t comprehend what he is trying to say except you. People may relate to a poem but the one who really gets affected is the person who the poem was written for” he told her. “Read the poem again and answer the question at the end” he added.

Anne started to read again but slower this time. While reading her mind was flashing scenes from the very first day they met. She could remember her first laugh with him. The feeling of her heart beating wildly for the first time and the unexplained feelings she had whenever he was around.

For the first part of the poem she was smiling for she could recall all the good things they enjoyed together. The feeling on her lips when they first kissed and up the last one that they had.

Towards the end of the poem she was in tears as she could feel the pain he was keeping inside. She knew even before what he was trying to say but this time it was clearer.

Anne was scared and he didn’t know that but this time it was time to face her fears.

It was time to respond to his question.